I started doing a set of rituals. I would do the LBROTP and the Middle pillar, followed by what is called the neophyte meditation (still not sure exactly what I was meant to ultimately achieve). It was part of a very long course I was planning to do but I feel a serious pull towards working with Lucifer and although I was doing the Bornless Ritual I struggled to actually see a spirit manifest.
I probably wasnt doing enough work on visualisation and soul cleansing and connecting with my HGA seemed like it wasnt happening any time soon. However the frustrating thing is when I would do the neophyte meditation my ears would reverberate and whatever object I stared at would start glowing and I would see a watery wash of indigo colour moving throughout the whole room. The room would fade out and go dark and then all these colours would appear from seemingly nowhere and sometimes there would be geometric fluctuations in the air. The thing is I have no idea what it is I'm actually seeing and still no spirit would appear before me. When I'm relaxed in the evening and sometimes when I wake up in the morning my ears are vibrating and reverberating and sometimes my whole body starts vibrating like I can feel the my body is a ball of vibrating energy but I can only project out of my body during sleep.
When i gaze on a sigil it glows and moves around the paper and my ears reverberate but I still havnt seen a spirit. Can anyone explain to me what is is I'm actually seeing? Am I seeing the astral light? Or simply just energy? I am a solitary practitioner so I kind of learn as I go from books and online research. Luckily I found this website thanks to Anewbiz and I am extremely grateful. I will continue the visualisation practices and I would greatly appreciate if someone could tell me what it is I am seeing, feeling and hearing. Thanks in advance and hope you are well
P.s. iv recently been working with lucifer and changed my practices and when I stare at his sigil the candles go crazy, my ears reverberate and I can feel his energy but I guess my senses aren't developed enough to see and hear him clearly yet.